Done but not forgotten

Last night was our final chance to grab the miscellaneous detritus that’s been floating about our old apartment, as we had to vacate in time for them to repaint the walls and replace the carpets so someone new could move in. We did end up taking a lot of the unclassifiable/unpackable stuff (curtain rods, plant pots) but we also left a lot of things behind, too.

Once we dropped the keys in the overnight deposit I felt a weight slipping away from my shoulders. I lived in that apartment for three years or so and learned a lot about myself while I lived there, and I’m glad to move on, though I did feel quite sad when I locked the door for the last time.

It also feels great, though. Like turning the page of a book to find a new chapter heading with one of those lovely illuminated letters to start it off.

Now I have to unpack the items from boxes that are piled up in every room of the house and have no time to do it (in fact I’m skipping something tonight so I can actually be at my house for more than an hour before going to bed, a rare opportunity). I’m imposing a two week deadline for this stage of things. I am going to try to organize a yard sale with our neighbors two weekends from now, so if I haven’t found a place for things inside the house, out it goes to find a new home.

At the same time that all this insane busy madness is going on, I keep seeing the most amazing and inspirational artwork and projects. It’s driving me crazy to not be able to sit down and start my feeble first steps toward creativity. But I have to be patient and take one step at a time, frustrating as it is to stretch things out so far. I’m finding myself in a weird struggle between achieving balance and attacking stuff with all my energy and focus. How can I sit serenely on a park bench surrounded by nature and appreciating the leaves and birdsong when I’m also dying to dance around and sling paint while shouting, ‘Help! I want to create!’?



Anyway, I’ve been thinking about collections and curating a lot lately, because I don’t really collect anything. But while I’m pondering that, my thoughtful mother has provided me with a jumping-off point by picking up two Harry Potter books in foreign languages (Spanish and Italian) during her travels!

Harry Potter e la Pietra Filosofale and Harry Potter y las Reliquias de la Muerte

I already have all the American covers and also one British book 7.

Finally, some quotes from a recent Keri Smith blog:

“i begin to write here and end up stopping for some reason. my mind does not think or reach outwardly these days.

she felt, not very “present”. just hearing her say that made me feel extremely relieved and understood as I had been feeling the EXACT same thing, but had not spoken of it to anyone. i felt my eyes get wide and my insides taking a deep breath.

right now I feel pulled in many directions but unable to connect.

this person looked at me and said, “it’s perfectly normal. you are in a new and very intense phase of your life. there’s no need to resist it.

damn, i really needed to hear that.”